Vayechi: Turning a “Not So Good Blessing” Into a Different Ending

Vayechi: Turning a "Not So Good Blessing" Into a Different Ending
Rabbi Angela Buchdahl

I had the good fortune to spend break with my family in Japan.
It’s a fascinating place, especially, religiously.
My guide said: “80% of Japanese are Shinto,
80% Buddhist and 90% atheist.”
I was never very good at math but…
She explained how many Japanese will go to Shinto shrines for
celebrations of life, like baby namings, and marriage.
But for funerals, a Buddhist temple, as they are more interested in the afterlife.
She said most Japanese attend both religion’s shrines with some regularity,
but it’s all more cultural than religious.

For the New Year, many Japanese will visit a Shinto shrine
to receive their fortune –their omijuki, a practice which dates back to the 14th C.
Our guide encouraged us to share in this custom.
So we put 200 yen into the donation box and my oldest son
reached into the big jar filled with folded papers to pick out
our collective family fortune for the new year.

We watched expectantly as Gabriel unfolded the paper,
which was about the size of the instructions you get inside a medicine bottle,
with as many folds.
Most of it was in Japanese, but on the back, was some translation in English.
We stopped short with the headline:
“NOT SO GOOD FORTUNE”

It went into specific categories with details:
MONEY: Things will improve with time.
ILLNESS: If you follow doctor’s order and not exceed your limits,
you will get better in the long run
TRAVEL: Unfavorable
My husband – the lawyer – was particularly dismayed to see:
LAWSUITS: Nearly impossible for you to win
What kind of fortune was this??

These Omikuji –which literally mean “sacred lots,”
vary widely, from small to big blessings, or small to big curses.
Had I known I was essentially buying a lottery ticket, I never would have played!
We all know that game is rigged.
But these sacred lots reflect a truth:
about the element of randomness and chance,
of blessings and curses in all our lives.

It’s impossible to see the devastating pictures coming out of LA this week
and not fear how our lives can change in an instant,
And puzzle over how a neighborhood could be entirely burned down
save one house, left untouched. A windswept lottery.
Or grapple with how so many of the biggest things in our lives
are not within our control.

Our NOT SO GOOD “FORTUNE,”
reminded me of the NOT SO GOOD BLESSINGS
that Jacob uses to “bless” his sons in this week’s Torah portion, Vayechi.
As Jacob is near the end of his life, all his sons gather around him
and he has choice words for each one:
Reuben, my first born…unstable as water, you shall excel no longer,
For when you mounted your father’s bed, you brought disgrace.

Shimon and Levi…their weapons are tools of lawlessness…
Cursed be their anger so fierce…
I will divide them in Jacob, scatter them in Israel.
Issachar is a strong boned ass, crouching among the sheepfolds.
You get the idea.

These blessings in the Bible, not unlike the Japanese Omikuji,
are not mere words, but hold a particular power. And Efficacy.
A link to divine mandate.
And point to a world in which the important things have already been pre-ordained, and are not within our control.

Today, there are many who believe that a person’s life is already determined
by what neighborhood they were born into and what schools they attend.
By the color of their skin. Or our IQ score.

In ancient times, I might argue that even more of a person’s life was predetermined in advance.
Who you married, what work you would do,
was decided by who your parents were, your tribe.
Whether or not you received blessings, birthrights, or inherited property
was all a matter of birth order, and gender. And of course, God’s favor.

And yet…things did not always go as tradition dictated.
Jacob knew this well–as the younger twin to his brother Esau, who – as the eldest –was set from birth to receive the birthright and blessing of the firstborn.
And yet, Jacob and his mother tricked his father Isaac
into giving him that birthright instead. Destiny overturned.

And in this week’s portion, as Jacob offers words to each of his children,
he blesses his grandchildren, the sons of Joseph as well.
And as he does, he crosses his hands and places the greater blessing
on the head of the younger Ephraim instead of the older Menassah.
Joseph, thinking that his blind father had made a mistake,
tried to move his hands to the correct son, but Isaac objects, saying
“the younger brother shall be greater.”

Even things that feel overly determined are not necessarily so.
Individuals can have some agency in shaping the story.

I thought about that with my omijuki – as this fortune left quite a bit of room for us to shape our prophecy saying: If, after mistakes and misunderstandings, if you strive for reform and believe with steadfast spirit, good fortune will be yours at last. This is more aspiration than prophecy.

And maybe that’s also the case for Jacob’s blessings.
When you really examine what he says to his sons,
his words sound more descriptive than prophetic:
You are unstable as water. Your anger is fierce.
Maybe we should hear these words not as blessing – or as curse,
But as an invitation.
Perhaps he is holding up a mirror to their actions, to encourage them to change.

Jacob’s final blessing to his sons may have been to tell them the truth:
“This is who I have known you to be.
Now who do you want to be?”
Each one of us still has the power to shape how our story ends.